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Talk:Hydrogen/@comment-108.63.103.212-20150612224018
i'm currently questioning my gender. I want to wear a suit to my grade 8 graduation? I'm happy to be mistaken for a male? But then again i'm more than comfortable in my "female body". I somewhat identify as a girl mentally? but then again i'm so confused that i don't even know what that feels like fully. in some situations/times/days i act/feel more masculine/feminine? Maybe i'm just thinking this way to be a "special snowflake"? Ugh I don't know. If i woke up in a "male body" then would I want to change back into my "female body"? well to answer that, i wouldn't mind at all. but then again like i said, i'm also comfortable in a "woman's body". i sometimes just, not like my feminine features. i wish to be taken for someone masculine. same with clothes. somedays i want to wear girlish sweaters with either a skirt/tights (never dresses haha.) somedays I want to dress in a suit and tie, or like male kpop singers. somedays i wish to be completely gender-neutral. sometimes i even wish my hair was long again, but sometimes i embrace the short, boyish haircut. sometimes i imagine myself as a wife/female/woman in the future. sometimes i imagine myself as a husband/male/man in the future. but mostly woman. but for some reason, i like the idea of being male/masculine in the future more? but then AGain the male thoughts may just be forced, along with my questioning itself. ugh, i may just be a "just a tomboy special snowflake". but i don't know for sure. asking myself "am i a girl/boy/neither/both" doesn't help much either because they all feel the same. that is, not 100%. but again, i might just think that way to feel "unique". huh, do i like being "mistakened for" to feel/be different" than the others? I may never know. but it still doesn't feel 100% right when I feel or do something considered "feminine". Maybe to feel different? maybe to be queer on purpose? maybe i just 'want' to be queer? i don't know, but maybe to keep being queer? wait, how can i keep being something that i apparently aren't? heh, i might just be thinking of the label itself. but then again the label is describing certain groups of people so... well, i don't know. but my friend can see me being bigender/genderfluid. but then again, even if i hang out with girls more because of their "non-sport playing" thing, but I'd rather hang with the guys more, since i get along with them much better. i can joke around a lot more without being judged or called "wierd". so what do you think i am? (i know this is for me to decide, but i need your imput.) i refer to myself as she/her/jenny/etc all my life, so idk about he/him/oliver or they/them/ollie. i just need help/advise. I'm thinking that i'm either a: - androgyne - tomboy (cis-female) - bigender - genderfluid - demigirl - etc that about wraps it up! all your imput/comments/suggestions/advise is much appreciated! (this is long omg im sorry welp)